like father, like son

let me tell you a really sad story. it's a story about bums in singapore and how they will never ever climb the social ladder and remain what they are: bums. i'm not talking about the bums the ladies have. i'm not talking about the buns BreadTalk sells. (hyper inflated prices, in my opinion.) i'm talking about lazy bums. not the lazy bones you and me (mostly me) will occasionally have but the real bums. their mission in life? bumm their way through it. and i tell you, i'm thankful for them, because they make up the cushion in society, so that you and me may piss and shit on them. and should we ever fall from grace, there's a limit; them.

they story is about a boy and his growing up years, from the perspective of an outsider, me. the story is also about family, which you will come to know about later. this story is about a boy named willy, or whatever it is. i never got around to actually asking him but i'll tell you later how i got to know his name. the story about willy, or dicky, or penis, is a touching tale about modern day hooliganism set in the bustling town of clementi. wow i just set up a real touching plot a la jack neo's pao ba, haizi (run, you kid!). we'll see. hahahahaha.

little willy was a willy. a fucking pain in the ass. if you ever have a willy in the ass, some of you may feel pleasure but with the exceptions of Great Anal Yahoos!, most guys won't like it. and he was a mighty prick when he was so small in primary school. i was a few years older and in the same school. i don't know how i got to recognise him and i assure you i'll be ashamed if i ever got to know him. i think it's mainly because that bloody prick acts as if he's a big fuck and being fatter (therefore bigger even if you're taller), he can bully others. we're talking micro calibration here because it's all still in primary school. so big bully bitch has people always screaming his name, 'willy willy willy!' come to think of it, i don't know if they're insulting him but he responded to that name. so willy he shall be!

that son of a bitch doesn't know his station. he can fucking dare to come up to me in an aggressive manner and start taunting me. for those of you who know my name, it's easy to make fun of it. but that's not the point. the point is that he fucking dares to do it. me being bigger in size and age and he dares it? damn lucky i'm not aggresive or i'll have a criminal record now. so everytime i see him, it's animosity. where's the love y'all? so people grow and gorw. he grows up, vertically and sideways. i graduate from primary school but i still see him around the neighbourhood.

fast forward to this year. we're all grown up. he bigger, fatter and definitely one of the 'brothers'. you know what i mean. those bums bumming around doing what they do best which is nothing and wasting their fathers' money. i would be sympathetic and feel for their parents but the truth is that the younger tan is the exact replica of the older tan. here's to back it up.

my uniform is not reallyn know in my neighbourhood. so when i was walking home with my freshly purchased you tiao and salivating, i heard someone call out, 'hey brother' in that really reeeeeeeeeeealy irritaing tone which we always hear. i looked up. guess what? i saw older willy!!!! it doesn't take a DNA sample to identify the older and younger versions as being related. not when their faces are exactly the same 'beat me up' type. it's exactly the same! i would have mistaken him for willy's twin if he didn't look so much older!!!!!!!

so that bastard continued, with me wondering if he was talking to me, 'monitor ar? prefect ar?'

yes he's talking to me. but i ignored him. then classic, 'you got 2dollar?'

2dollarS. not 2dollar. and when he asked me for that amount, there was even a numerical handsign to illustrate it! you know the v for vitctory sign? yeah that's the 1. and he even smiles that cheesy smile with his hand just his mouth level. damn corny.

fuck you, you bloody bum. no wonder your son is like. it's a vicious cycle, i tell you. and oh, i didn't even bother to speak to him.